I'm on a business trip so a little more flexibility was coming my way to dress and live out my feminine side. And I used it. In the past I wrote about my adventures dressed extremely unconvincingly as a tween girl picking up a pizza. Well, I was going to do that today, but when I called the pizza place, I just didn't like the vibe. I'd driven a bit aways, and was depressed about all the effort for nothing.
Then I drove past a quiet Subway. And I realized "hey, they do pick-up orders, too". I do like to phone ahead of time just to let people prepare themselves, either to steel themselves against the strangeness of look forward to mocking me. The following is close to how the conversation went:
"Hi, can I order something and pick it up?"
"Sure what would you like?"
"Yeah, could I just have a six-inch meatball sub?" (my favorite)
"Yep" [insert discussion about bread and cheese here]
Then I had some inspiration stemming from my interest in humiliation and initiations.
"And, can I add another sub to that?"
"Sure, what kind?"
"Um...six inches. And just make it as weird as you can."
"You mean like teriyaki and sriracha?"
"Sure, as disgusting as you can"
"See, the person eating it lost a bet, so it's not a problem."
"And you should know his niece just finished giving him a makeover, so he's going to be dressed a bit strange. Feel free to make lots of fun of him."
"Okay, good to know. It'll be about 10 minutes."
So I got into my clothing, and drove over to the place.
I had a white bra with small water balloons in it, a grey plaid skirt with glitter undertone, a black choker necklace with a heart charm, a dangling silver Eiffel Towel, and a few thread bracelets. My lips were covered with bright pink lipstick, a small sequined baseball cap, and blue mirrored sunglasses finished the outfit. Declaring my attitude was the tank top pictured, one that didn't hide my bra straps.
Well, a horde had descended upon Subway. Line out the door, so I wasn't going to do that. I circled the block for ten minutes until it was a short line. I walked in with only an older gentlemen paying, and the "Sandwich artist" looked at me with a huge smile.
"Pick-up order?" She asked.
"How'd you know?" I answered.
So it was my turn to pay, and the college girl took her sweet time. "Wow you look so uncomfortable."
"Well, I'm not used to wearing this stuff...."
"How long do you have to have it on for?" She asked, as a couple other employees gathered next to her.
"Just a couple more hours."
"That must have been some bet....oh, I love your wallet!"
I gave her the money from my furry pink wallet with PRINCESS embroidered in dark pink script on it.
We exchanged cash and change, and she handed me the bag. "Here, you go. Have a great day!"
Flooded with endorphins, I hopped back in the car to drive off. The sub was unpleasant, but not disgusting. Not sure if I was disappointed. Perhaps in retrospect I should have tried to arrange it that I had to eat it there. Motivation.
So I welcome about how to refine or expand adventures like this for y next opportunity.
One last thing -- as I finished up, I started crumpling the wrappers. One was marked "MEATBALL" and on the other was written "LOSER"
I'm keeping that wrapper.